number seven: love letters

last night i couldn't sleep. this happens a lot, i'm exhausted most of the day and then completely restless at night. so to cure my tossing and turning, i tend to read until i can't keep my eyes open. last night i wasn't in the mood to get heavily involved in the holocaust journal i'm in the midst of, so i took a gander at my bookshelf and decided to take a look at a book my mom gave me last year for christmas. she knows how nosy i am and gave me a book entitled "other people's love letters," which is a scrapbook of love letters, rejections, poems, and other mementos that document bits and pieces of a tryst.

i love that word, tryst.

i have a tendency to keep every scrap of paper ever given to me. i have a giant box of notes folded only the way 8th grade girls can fold, cards given for various birthdays from relatives i only see at christmas, and pictures from coloring books colored by the most irritating little girls who liked to pee in public places and made me look like a terrible nanny. i also have saved every love letter ever written to me. this can be hazardous when i'm feeling self destructive, bitter, or drunk. however, i've been giving this whole love letter business a second thought since reading through that book last night. most notably, i've come to the conclusion that love letters aren't strictly romantic, from the people we share epic make out sessions with. but they are also the written proof of unimaginable, awe inspiring, friendships.

everyone loves feeling loved. duh. but outside of your middle school boyfriends and the best friends who braid friendship bracelets, a written piece of love doesn't really exist anymore. i guess that's what makes the concept so special as we get older. i was reading letters written by adults, so enamored with their significant other they couldn't just say it- they had to write it down. that sort of documentation signifies something great, something romantic, and perhaps something that suddenly blindsides you that you can't live without.

the love letters i've always loved receiving and enjoyed reading last night are the ones that document a fleeting, fly by night, random, especially ridiculous event or trait that is totally exclusive to the relationship and person. and often, the note points something out that the other person had no idea was noticed. which makes it all the more unique and incredible.

people need to feel loved more often. i recently received a love letter from one of my oldest, dearest friends and i know it's a piece of paper that will never end up in the recycle. maybe we should all write down our love more, maybe people would hurt less if we did. maybe on a very bad terrible no good day those little mumblings of adoration and affection are what everyone needs. we need to love each other more, and write it down so that in times of doubt, when a hand can't be held, those words are there.

just a suggestion.